cia before he moved over to the white house. together together, they are an impressive team. we will in safe hands. it's no surprise really to hear dick cheney talk about second-rate people because he knows about second-rate people. after all, he is responsible for giving us the most second-rate vice president we ever had in our history. dick cheney himself. senator sherrod brown joins us tomorrow. don't miss it. come back and join us again tomorrow morning.

[ ♪ theme ♪ ] >> stephanie: oh, pardon me. ive just doodling a picture of

george w. bush naked in the shower. >> gak! >> stephanie: good morning jacki schechner. >> i love those pictures. >> laura, hand me the flesh-colored crayon, would you? >> stephanie: at least you're not on a carnival cruise. >> i missed that story. [ laughter ] >> stephanie: carnival cruise ship is on fire. ship is currently on fire. >> and toilets were just up d running thisorning. >> oh, that sounds so unpleasant. >> stephanie: food poisoning no toilets and the ship's on fire. >> other than that. >> ain't we got fun! >> stephanie: all right. here she is in the current news center our news director, jacki schechner. >> the pope is stepping down. pope benedict xvi announced this morning he will resign on february 28th. in a statement to the cardinals

he cites advancing age and deteriorating health. while the move is not unprecedented, it is not common. the last pope to resign was pope gregory 12 in 1415. pope benedict xvi has served less than eight years but is 85 years old. vatican spokesman says the announcement was a surprise. the pope will continue to carry out his duties until february 28th and then the cardinals will select a replacement but that won't be immediate. the spokesman's best guess is we'll have a new pope by easter which this year, falls on march 31st. president obama is awarding the medal of honor today to army sergeant clinton roam shea for his courageous actions during a combat operation in afghanistan in october of 2009. romechet is the fourth living person to receive the medal. the president will travel to asheville, north carolina then

he goes to atlanta, georgia and then chicago. that's on wednesday thursday, and friday. the plan is to bring his state of the union message to the people. he's going to talk about his ideas to strengthen the economy for the middle class. vice president biden continues his conversation today about gun safety and possible new legislation in philadelphia. he is holding a roundtable with law enforcement officials and members of congress. senator bob casey will be there also attending philadelphia mayor michael nutter and new york city police commissioner ray kelly. we'll see you on the other side.

>> announcer: ladies and gentlemen, it's "the stephanie miller show." ♪ i'm walkin' on sunshine ♪ ♪ i'm walkin' on sunshine ♪

♪ and it's time to feel good ♪ ♪ hey, all right now ♪ ♪ and it's time to feel good ♪ >> stephanie: uh-huh. good point. you know what else liked to paint? >> hitler. >> stephanie: you know who else? weapons of mass destruction that didn't? just sayin'. we're not sayin', just sayin'. >> hitler was good at drawing buildings but not people so much. >> neither is george bush. >> stephanie: remember how jim used to do george w. bush drawings with his crayons? >> this is a bird, i think. >> stephanie: messing up my picture of george w. bush in the shower. >> oh! >> stephanie: six minutes after the hour. 1-800-steph-12 the phone number. happy monday. sarah palin apparently said to the vatican how is that popey changing thing working out for you? [ ♪ circus ♪ ] rocky mountain mike said -- at any rate -- >> is the pope german?

>> computer says yes. >> break news this morning that the pope is resigning in case you're just getting up. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] >> stephanie: right. >> that's going to affect me in so many ways not. >> not really. >> not at all. >> stephanie: we were saying no matter how bad your weekend was and mine was pretty bad at least you're not on a carnival cruise ship. [ ding ding ] [ applause ] how about that public address announcement. the ship appears to be -- >> what's the word i'm looking for? oh, on fire. none of the toilets are working. so if you're suffering from norovirus or food pois -- poisoning, just hold it. >> air conditioning isn't working. everybody is on the decks. >> party on the lido deck. >> ain't we got fun! >> stephanie: i don't understand why anybody goes on a cruise ever. all right.

stephaniemiller.com. the web site. >> for the karaoke. >> stephanie: you can do that on dry land. >> really? i had no idea. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] >> stephanie: crisis of epic proportion, snowstorm back east. dogs and cats living together. however, gawker brings us a story. think snowstorm is bad? in brazil, it is raining spiders! [ screaming ] >> oh, god! [ ♪ dramatic ♪ ] >> brazil has some of the nastiest spiders in the world. >> stephanie: you're worried about a little snow falling on your head. meanwhile, in brazil, it's raining spiders. [ screaming ] footage proves that thousands of spiders are falling from the sky. in brazil! [ screaming ] now i'm debating whether i would rather be on a carnival cruise line or in brazil. i'm not sure. >> what caused the spiders to rain from the sky? >> stephanie: no. that's why it's terrifying. >> probably a storm lifted them up. >> stephanie: just because.

>> they were airborne and came down again. >> stephanie: do you care why when a spider falls on your head. >> and latches on to you like an alien? >> ahh! >> stephanie: what is the scientific cause of this? oh! wowee. meanwhile, you just -- we've got news breaking left and right. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] it is broken when it breaks here. the cop, the ex-cop -- >> he's now a target for drones. >> stephanie: wow. [ explosion ] there goes lake arrowhead. that's going to suck for a certain bunch of snowboards. >> it is thermal carrying cameras. >> stephanie: totally harsh. >> it would be white water snow boarding. it would be a little different. >> stephanie: oh god. by the way, david in new york city brings us the --

[ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] we played some of this on friday. every time something happens at least sean hannity tries to make it, oh, he's a liberal. murderer guy. the wing nuts are trying to label the killer cop as a liberal progressive. he was not an obama supporter. before you start your argument that you believe i would vote for obama because he has the same skin color as me, [ bleep ] you. i didn't vote in this last election. as my choice of candidate jon huntsman didn't win the primary candidacy. [ wah wah ] that explains a lot. >> sure. >> stephanie: okay. meanwhile, back in sexy liberal land. st. louis bitches be crazy too. yeah chicago bitches be crazy. tickets are literally flying out the window for april 13th sexy liberal. chicago bitches be crazy. what about the st. louis bitches who are coming to see you. my partner and i are coming up for the third time as steph heads to see the show at the chicago theatre by the

antiquated rail system known as amtrak. st. louis bitches. [ applause ] crazy bitches. >> travis and i are working on coming. >> stephanie: that would be totes adorbs. we have rude pundit coming up. eric boehlert. i swear to god that's the best thing about my weekend is eric boehlert tweets. >> really? >> stephanie: love him so much. one thing i don't love so much -- [ explosion ] every week he says something that makes my head. [ explosion ] it started with the should -- sunday after the election, remember that? should the president, by way of bipartisan outreach, what is with this bipartisan outreach? [ bleep ] he won for [ bleep ] sake. should he bring in -- >> is there a role for senator goldwater in your administration? >> stephanie: oh yes. he can have any cabinet position

he would like. [ ♪ magic wand ♪ ] >> stephanie: that's what -- the tools they had on. the two right wing -- mike murphy and oh, yes i'm really hoping the president is not as combative as in his inaugural. >> oh, shut up. >> combative. >> stephanie: so i can't even remember who. david gregory asked somebody, should the president withdraw chuck hagel's nomination? no! should he just step down and nominate someone else? >> no! >> stephanie: what? no! >> perhaps a republican? chuck hagel is a republican! >> twit! >> bill press had a really good point this morning. he and i are getting really tired of seeing john mccain and lindsey graham every single sunday on every single show! >> stephanie: the senator of the green room. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] i was just going to get to that. lindsey graham will permanently -- on the couch or in a green aren't. he threatened to block votes on

nominees for c.i.a. director and defense secretary until the administration gives more information about benghazi. well i declare -- i'll be sipping my mint julep. >> i don't think we should allow brennan to go forward for the c.i.a. directorship. hagel to be confirmed to secretary of defense until the white house gives us an accounting. >> stephanie: then he. >> announcer: ed away. >> was he one of the guys who gave -- there are some senators that those shows could book that were against the benghazi hearings period. how about getting the other side instead of these two. >> stephanie: exactly. >> world's angriest two leprechauns. >> one of them is a little more tastefully to the point. >> i'm not insinuating anything. >> stephanie: the conventional wisdom drives me crazy. we can't get anything done on

guns. that's too much. this weapons ban we can't possibly. i agreed with my friend, arianna on "meet the press." she said please, picture of the president skeet shooting is so depressing. it is so true. it is obvious i have to pander to the gun people. okay. yeah. >> i didn't have a problem with it. >> stephanie: okay. all right. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] >> the president's not skeet shooting. >> well then it is photo shopped. >> smoke coming out of the wrong -- skeeters, people who don't believe -- it is not angled the right way to have a -- the shells and -- >> i think he has people around him to carry vests full of shells. i don't think he has to have a vest full of shells. >> stephanie: he's like the king. he doesn't carry cash. >> your money's not good here. >> stephanie: now i'm going to be -- i'll be in right-wing

world tomorrow because i called the president the king. >> you're already -- >> stephanie: see, liberals are admitting it. >> you were on newsbusters over the weekend. >> stephanie: what did i do? >> you used the term rice ball around michelle malkin. >> i know. >> eating the rice ball. >> it is a meme internet thing. >> stephanie: we posted it on my facebook page. i wonder idea i got these e-mails. how dare, you're so racist about michelle malkin. i literally got these e-mails. what are they talking about? >> you said michelle malkin was unpacking a rice ball. >> healthcare nonsense. >> they thought you were being racist because they didn't hear -- the half hour before, yeah us talking about the -- >> stephanie: the theme of the show was the rice ball. go check it out. it is adorable. >> it is still on your facebook page. >> stephanie: you were saying he seemed surprised every time

he took a bite. oh, it's still here! wow. >> newsbusters calls us out on racism for the baby monkey meme? >> i don't know. that's what that was about. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] >> stephanie: the best news of the weekend, george w. bush's paintings. another jim ward skit come to life. >> i made a picture. it is a picture of me in the shower looking at me in the mirror. i'm in the shower looking at a mirror. >> stephanie: now there's all of the art critics who have come out of the artwork. we may never know why he likes depicting himself in the bathroom. the discredited former leader trying to wash himself clean of the long failure. >> wow. >> stephanie: purifying water he can see himself his very soul in the mirror. there is nothing left you about the grave.

his eyes say. >> wow. i really think people are reading too much into that. >> i always thought art criticism was a waste of time. >> elephants have done better paintings than that. i've seen elephants. >> chimpanzees have done better. >> stephanie: look at all of the work that clinton is doing. >> i'm in the shower. look at me in the mirror. >> picture of me washing my junk. i thought better of it. better not do that. not safe for -- >> stephanie: may i say the one thing, if you're someone like me that's had your privacy hacked that is awful. it doesn't matter who it is. it is awful. >> we don't encourage that. >> stephanie: exactly. all right. as you and i both, we shared stories. has more to do with who we dated. 18 minutes after the hour. >> there's that. >> stephanie: if you've had your privacy hacked to that

degree you understand how it feels. chris and stephanie. 18 minutes after the hour. right back on "the stephanie miller show." >> announcer: the left roars back. [cat meowing] >> announcer: it's "the stephanie miller show."

current tv is the place for true stories. with award winning documentaries that take you inside the

headlines. real, gripping, current. documentaries... on current tv. ♪

>> stephanie: it is "the stephanie miller show." oh dear god. just when you thought the republican party could not get any pathetic. a republican strategist said on a sunday show, we need rubio because he knows who tupac is. >> wow. >> stephanie: tupac was shot 16 years ago. salt and pep na has -- salt and pepa has broken up and will has moved on from the fresh prince of bellaire. >> they're going to try to book biggy smalls. what do you mean he's not available? >> stephanie: notorious d-e-a-d. what? [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] nicole wallace argued that rubio was good for the party as a whole because he knows who tupac is. that knowledge proved he could connect to young voters. our friend representative keith ellison pointed out to is like

lipstick on a pig. republicans have a core values problem not a who is tupac shakur problem. did you see the "time" magazine? marco. >> rubio. >> stephanie: laura in pennsylvania, you're on the "the stephanie miller show." hi laura. >> caller: hi, stephanie. jim and chris. my main topic is i have to admit i'm scared to death that obama -- he swore he wouldn't put it on the table. and it is just -- i'm -- i could lose my home. i'm supporting my 6-year-old grandson. i have a $24,000 loan out you know. i'm just hoping they don't touch it. i'm just praying. but anyway, what is it with our social security that the republicans want to take for us but yet we have to pay for their health insurance and their pensions? >> stephanie: yep. i agree with you. senator sanders says over and over again we do not have a

crisis in social security. remember they tried this the last time with george bush, he kept using the word crisis thinking if he said that, we would privatize it out of panic or something. >> just raise the cap. >> stephanie: there's an idea. >> sure. >> stephanie: helpers. >> $116,000 a year, above that, you don't pay into it at all? it's insane. >> stephanie: speaking of bush -- [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] i'm fascinated with the art critics reviews of his doodles. they say jim, he is a better painter than churchill and hitler. so there's that. he's a better painter than hitler was. >> wow. >> actually, hitler was pretty good at painting buildings but not people which tells you a lot. >> stephanie: yes, they're both self-portraits. both showing mr. bush bathing as we know. one in the shower, one in the bathtub. one shows mr. bush in the shower seen from the back. his well-known squint caught in

the shaving mirror. the other is a birth's eye view as he soaks with the water running. and then there's some controversy, chris, as to why it looks like the one knee is swollen. two paintings could be said to depict the introverted self-absorption for which he is known. perhaps he's trying to seek the redemption of his less fortuitous decisions as president. >> reading way much into it. >> stephanie: kind of a dufus. >> i was going to do something naive, they call it there. in the critic world. i can't draw too good. >> stephanie: judy in michigan. hi judy. >> caller: hi, stephanie. how are you? >> stephanie: good. go ahead. >> caller: good. i feel like shirley sherrod. do you remember her? >> stephanie: yes. >> caller: i'm exhausted. these idiot republicans will not leave our president governed.

i just wanted to say to somebody why don't -- mccain and lindsey graham just go on an island somewhere or -- >> stephanie: like gilligan and the captain? >> the island of misfit toys. >> stephanie: lindsey graham and leon panetta on a sunday show. >> this is from the hearing. >> are you are surprised the president never called you secretary panetta and said how is it going? >> normally, in these situations -- did he know the level of threat -- >> let me finish the answer. we were deploying the forces. he knew we were deploying the forces. he was being kept -- >> i hate to interrupt you but i got limited time. we didn't deploy any forces. >> why is he asking questions if he doesn't want to hear the answer? >> stephanie: lindsey graham. >> chance for him to pontificate. >> if i were a family member and one of my loved ones was killed

in benghazi, i would be sick to my stomach. >> stephanie: i would certainly get to the bottom of who cut the funding for security -- oh, it was me. >> oops. >> stephanie: this was the fit we talked about earlier. >> play it again? >> stephanie: senator lindsey graham. >> i don't think we should allow brennan to go forward for the c.i.a. directorship, hagel to be confirmed to secretary of defense until the white house gives us an accounting. [baby crying] [ applause ] >> stephanie: there he is. lindsey graham with his [ bleep ] fit. >> he won't do anything until i tell him to. until i'm ready for them to do something. i'm going to sit here and stamp my feet until they do everything i want them to. >> that's the only thing they have left. seriously. >> stephanie: all right. yeah, we have lots to -- guess who's on cnn. dick morris. looks like he's reinventing

himself on cnn. now he's a moderate republican! [ ♪ magic wand ♪ ] >> all of that stuff, i said, don't believe any of it. >> stephanie: right. >> i'm being serious now though. trust me. >> stephanie: 25 minutes after the hour. rude pundit is next on "the stephanie miller show." going to do the young turks. i think the number one thing that viewers like about the young turks is that we're honest. they know that i'm not bs'ing them with some hidden agenda, actually supporting one party or the other. when the democrats are wrong, they know that i'm going to be the first one to call them out. they can question whether i'm right, but i think that the audience gets that this guy, to the best of his ability, is trying to look out for us.

surprise -- your house was built on an ancient burial ground. [ ghosts moaning ] surprise -- your car needs a new transmission. [ coyote howls ] how about no more surprises? now you can get all the online trading tools you need without any surprise fees. ♪ ♪ it's not rocket science. it's just common sense. from td ameritrade.

>> you look familiar. are you on on the television or something? >> sorry buddy. you got me confused with

stephanie miller. >> stephanie: monday, you know what that means. unless somebody -- rude pundit. ♪♪ ooh pa, pa, pa, pa ooh ♪ >> stephanie: good morning papa. >> good morning. >> stephanie: please tell me you're not as chris still is from the weekend. >> i never stop that. >> stephanie: we were talking about the george w. bush paintings as well. you posted them under paintings that creep the rude pundit the [ bleep ] out. [ laughter ] you point out as we did you say sure, it is kind of [ bleep ] to put this up since it was stolen from the hacked e-mail account of bush's sister but the rude pundit has to tell you that self-portrait of the man himself is fascinating. >> it is. you know it could have been titled -- i don't know, maybe he would have titled it i found the weapons or something like that. >> stephanie: you say --

>> that would be the one where he's staring at his toes. justice his toes poking up out of the tub at the end. >> stephanie: you say the first thing rude pundit thought was look out behind you. was him awaiting his elderly male lover for some nude shower wrestling. >> oh! >> stephanie: everybody interprets art differently. >> that's right. we don't know his intention! so it's open. he's an artist. he would want that. >> here's a picture of a dukey i left in the toilet. talk about weapons of mass destruction. >> stephanie: nah he's wondering if anybody will catch him [ bleep ] down the drain. that could be as deep as it goes. >> really, i think so. i just wonder where are the pictures of him clearing brush? why isn't he painting that? why is he painting anything that's vaguely the macho guy that we got to watch all of those years? it is just him getting clean.

>> maybe he's got -- >> stephanie: here's my ducky. >> the photo of him hang out with ralph lauren like all the macho guys do. >> stephanie: i love it when you get your family research council -- your super-duper prayer -- this week, pray for straight scouts and against the passage of violence against women act. that's what they would like you to pray for right? >> that's right. you know, against the scouts being against gay scouts, that's understandable. the vote against the violence against women act because jesus wants you to do that, just kind of weird to me. >> what's their reasoning? >> stephanie: which woman would jesus hit? >> do you know their reasoning? >> because it is loaded up with liberal things like we don't want -- we want to give protection to gays and lesbians who are abused. and we want to give protection to illegal immigrants, illegal immigrant women who are abused.

you know, they're here illegally. how is a smack really illegal? >> stephanie: i see. how christian. >> oh, and don't forget, don't forget that the tribal council stuff, that's a thing that -- that tribal law takes precedence in these cases for violence against native-american women. which eric cantor has just lost his mind over. >> stephanie: yes exactly. you say, the one thing that has bugged me [ bleep ] about the whole gay or not gay scouts issue, the fact that the anti-gay site has a problem with lesbian den leaders. the gay man can't do it because they might lust for the boys. what's your argument for the lesbians? you prefer straight women who love the [ bleep ] hanging out with high school aged eagle scouts? yes, one would think -- what better solution than a lesbian den mother, right? >> right lesbian den mother, it's fine. why wouldn't you want?

you should be encouraging lesbian den mothers. but maybe that's supporting -- i don't know, lesbians being mothers. maybe that's the problem. >> johnny has two den mothers. >> stephanie: then obviously you wait until the drone stuff but -- you wade into the drone stuff. it is not happy clappy but it is realism. [ ♪ magic wand ♪ ] you say of the candidates who had a chance this last election, who would you rather have in office. the guy who does drone strikes and has marginally higher taxes on the worthy or the guy who blocked any gun control legislation. would you rather have barry goldwater or the dude who escalated the vietnam war but signed civil rights laws. it is living in the world you have, not the world you want. >> wow. that was reasonable! >> stephanie: what's happened to you? >> you can sit here and despise and want to try to change our policy on drone strikes but still sit there and go well, okay you know.

it is great that, for instance, in the state of the union apparently obama is going to call for getting rid of some of our nuclear weapons. it is like -- groovy! and now let's elect a congress that wants to stop drone strikes. i mean, that's actually probably again i think i've said this before on the show. the kind of spin you can put on some of the policies that are so reprehensible that obama has is it's almost like he's daring congress to say you guys put into place -- you guys allowed this expansion of executive power. you guys stop it! >> stephanie: yeah, rude, it is not that -- obviously we talked about this on the show. we're not all troubled to some degree about it. how -- what do you do? but i think you're right. when you compare it to george bush's two ground wars, the fact that we're getting everybody out of iraq and afghanistan, you know and i think it is most compelling to me when we have military people call and write

and say hey it saves soldier's lives. i guess there is that, right? >> well, i think maybe the bigger outrage here for some on the left is that there's no oversight. it is simply the word of one person. now, he may be getting all of the advice in the world but there's nobody that -- there's no check or balance to that power. and isn't that a frightening amount of power for a president the executive power in the country to have. >> stephanie: right. you know you brought up a point about congress. i was reading this piece in salon from a former congressman tom allen saying the g.o.p. speaks a different language. i was watching, i think it was -- you go through each and every issue. i'm sure the president will talk about this tomorrow night in the state of the union. the american people on his side on all of the issues. this is what he ran on. these are all of the issues that -- and literally it is the

republicans in congress. that's why when david gregory or whoever tries to make it seem like both sides do it, it is congressional republicans right? that is the problem. >> right. it is congressional republicans and gerrymandered districts and i think the solution is, you know we put all of this money into ads and all of this money into superpacs. how about inside we do this. we put a bunch of money into moving people on the left into the gerrymandered districts. >> stephanie: yep. that's a good idea. >> we just fill it. we build apartment complexes that are there and give discounts to people who agree to vote a certain way. and we take over the gerrymandered districts using capitalism. >> stephanie: right. interesting what tom allen says. former congressman tom allen. g.o.p. speaks a different language. you try serving with the republicans. i spent 12 years in congress and lost hope we could talk to each other. as i listened to baffling arguments on the house floor and

private conversations, i lost hope for bipartisan agreement on our major public policy challenges on budgets taxes healthcare, climate change, it made no difference to our republican colleagues. what democrats took as well-established fact, republicans dismissed as opinions. do they believe what they say in the answer was huish -- usually no. there you go you turn to the sunday shows and it is the president's fault. why won't the president do more bipartisan. what is wrong with him? it's like -- >> i love -- we want spending cuts and the president had better tell us which ones. >> exactly. >> stephanie: now, of course they're trying to blame the sequester that they all voted for, on the president. >> the sequester he was cornered into. that great keith ellison moment when he was on, i forget which show this weekend, he was on with a republican congressman who started blaming the president for the sequester and ellison just said no. you guys were holding the debt

limit hostage. and you wanted this. and now we have it. and so the president was willing to offer a deal but because they refused in any way to budge on taxes, that there was no deal. you know, i love the short-term memory, too. because you have lindsey graham now, screeching about benghazi, you know. total screaming meme about it. i just can't -- i have to picture him in some kind of frilly floral print. [ laughter ] >> stephanie: screaming. like if it were raining spiders on him. >> right, exactly! raining spiders and rice balls. >> oh! >> see there ya go! >> but yet, he was one of the -- when he first got to the senate, when he was in the house of representatives, he was one of the biggest supporters of bush on weapons of mass destruction. >> stephanie: that's right. >> it's like where's the investigation of all of the

people and then he wasn't somebody who was so upset about the weapons of mass destruction. >> stephanie: right. you know how clever speaking of the sequestration, how clever they are with the social media. boehner has invented a new word via twitter he thinks will turn this whole thing around. he makes the case the president's to blame for the upcoming automatic spending cuts and it is hash tag obama quester. oh that's clever, boehner. >> he had nothing to do with the sequester. >> stephanie: house g.o.p. has voted to replace the sequester twice. >> wow. this is now getting -- this is putting obama at the front of every word. it is now getting as clever as using gate or tard. >> stephanie: exactly. nicely done. rudeness -- [ buzzer ] rude pundit, see ya next week, honey. love ya. >> bye. [ buzzer ]

>> stephanie: stop it! right back on "the stephanie miller show." >> ex-catholic girls gone wild. her grade school nuns would like to slap her silly. it's "the stephanie miller show." now find the most hard core driver in america. that guy, put him in it. what's this? [ male announcer ] tell him he's about to find out. you're about to find out.

[ male announcer ] test it. highlight the european chassis 6 speed manual, dual exhaust wide stance, clean lines have him floor it, spin it punch it, drift it put it through its paces is he happy? oh ya, he's happy! [ male announcer ] and that's how you test your car for fun. easy. [ piano plays ] troy polamalu's going deeper. ♪ ♪ and so is head & shoulders deep clean. [ male announcer ] with 7 benefits it goes deep to remove grease, gunk and flakes. deep. like me. [ male announcer ] head & shoulders deep clean for men. ♪ ♪

(vo) she gets the comedians laughing and the thinkers thinking. >>ok, so there's wiggle room in the ten commandments, that's what you're saying.

(vo) she's joy behar. >>current will let me say anything. >> nobody but -- >> stephanie miller -- >> and me. you're the first. you're the last. my everything. >> stephanie: hmm. it is "the stephanie miller show." welcome to it. 50 minutes after the hour. 1-800-steph-12 the phone number toll free from anywhere. eric boehlert, media matters and right-wing world at the top of the hour.

let's go to blan in chicago. you're on "the stephanie miller show." >> caller: hi, stephanie, jim and chris. >> hello. >> caller: look, remember when the deal came out. they were all over the tv everywhere saying we've got 98% of what we wanted. we've got 98%. this is that deal. this is that 98% of what they wanted. and they got it. >> stephanie: right. absolutely. they think we have like short-term memory loss, don't they? >> caller: absolutely. all i wanted to say. >> stephanie: thank you honey. guess who else was on the sunday show. eric cantor. >> the problem is, david every time you turn around, the answer is to raise taxes. he just got his tax hike on the wealthy. you can't in this town, every three months, raise taxes. >> taxes. who does that? crazy! >> stephanie: such a smarmy

bastard, i'm sorry. he irritates the bejesus out of me. all right. yes. this is clever. >> when did the government ever raise taxes? oh, reagan did it three times. >> stephanie: he jumped into that to blame the president for the sequester. hash tag obama-quester. clever! the boner tweeted that. >> the goal to rally the republican base around the term hash tag obama quester that falls right off the tongue, this could turn either -- pressure president obama to come up with a deal fave tonight g.o.p. or if the sequester cements the idea that it is potentially devastating consequences are obama's fault except there are stories like this that get out so it looks more handy. >> we'll make it look like it's his fault. that will show them. >> stephanie: eric cantor jumped into the twitter game. sequester number one an issue obama created for which he refuses to take responsibility.

number two democrats excuse for higher taxes. hash tag obama-quester. okay. eric cantor, spending is a problem in washington. i hope president obama offers an alternative to hash tag obama quester. >> god. >> stephanie: so plunky. >> how do they figure that the sequester is obama's fault? >> stephanie: can i just say -- >> they don't. >> they're saying it and hoping. >> stephanie: just saying progressives just a little more clever with the social media. matt iglesias wrote why did speaker boehner vote for this horrible sequest summer 174 republicans voted for it. lol gop writes what do you call it when boehner gets what he wanted? hash tag obama-quester. stop it. you're not good at the social media thing. stop trying. >> neither are you personally. >> stephanie: i don't claim to

be. dana in maryland, you're on "the stephanie miller show." >> caller: good morning, everybody. how are you? i love your nail polish, steph. >> stephanie: i got new gels. i never do color. >> this is the first time. >> stephanie: girl tip from jacki schechner and melissa fitzgerald. >> caller: i was like wow, she's wearing nail polish. >> stephanie: i never used to get it before because i'm active and it peels too quickly. [ ♪ hypnotic ♪ ] these last up to two weeks. >> caller: they're beautiful. they look terrific. chris, i love your shirt. >> stephanie: you know why i did it? because you can see if you watch the tv, how many times chris misses a cue. this time, i can -- >> caller: when you're giving him the finger, we can see it. i love your shirt chris. jim, you are on fire today. hilarious as always. no seriously just those little one-liners, like i write them down. >> stephanie: he slips them in

before he tells you you're pretty. >> caller: i love it. i was just going to talk about eric cantor because you know, he's saying how much he loves women, he is still blocking the -- >> stephanie: violence against women act. >> caller: what is that about? it is absolutely ridiculous. he's an idiot. >> stephanie: all right. we've used up the word idiot this hour. that's it. no more. >> computer says no. >> eric cantor not liking women. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] >> stephanie: all right. for those of us political geeks state of the union tomorrow. i love it! >> stephanie: it is on at 6:00 our time. >> then i have to edit everything down. >> stephanie: a news friend of mine texted me over the weekend. so what are you doing? i'm getting ready to go to bed. he said it is like 7:30. that's what time babies and milk men go to bed.

>> milk men? when is the last time you saw a milkman? >> buggy manufacturers go to bed. >> stephanie: you go to bed when babies do. shut up. president obama will focus his state of the union on boosting job creation and economic growth. the word is he'll also use his prime time address to announce debts for the war in afghanistan by the end of 2014. the president would address taxes and looming across the board budget cuts known as hash tag obama quester. he said i'm prepared to do a big package that ends this governess crisis where every few months we're threatening this hard one recovery. so anyway, i'm excited about it. >> yeah. >> stephanie: all right. i'm sure we'll talk about gun control. oh cleopatra crowley did you see this? this teenage girl performed for the president at the inaugural

parade. was killed by gun violence in chicago. >> within a mile of the obama's home. >> stephanie: this was her mother. >> you don't know how hard this really is. and those of you who do know how hard this is, i'm sorry. i'm sorry. >> heartbreaking. >> stephanie: interesting story. i'm sure there's no connection here. states with the higher gun ownership and weak gun laws leads the nation in gun deaths. >> what a shock. >> stephanie: headline. it is gun. >> i think wayne lapierrre should be forced to meet with all of the families of shooting victims. >> stephanie: again, not the only part of the equation. part of it. you can't ignore it. states with higher gun ownership rates and weak gun laws have the highest rates of gun deaths. the analysis reveals the five states are the highest rates from alaska, louisiana montana wyoming.

they had a per death gun rate far exceeding the per capita. each state has lax gun laws. by contrast with those of ownership have lower rates. >> they're connected to states like indiana which is where the guns are coming into chicago. >> stephanie: last in the states for gun deaths. hawaii rhode island, new jersey and new york. >> it is not easy for people in hawaii to go next door to indiana. >> stephanie: unless you're really good on the paddleboat. >> more guns in hawaii, clearly. that will make it even safer. >> stephanie: exactly. what? [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] >> stephanie: out here in california, i'm just saying we tend to lead the way in things. california democrats propose stricter gun -- strictest gun regulations in the nation. i'll go through some of the ideas. but they seem to make sense to me. >> absolutely. it will make the gun nuts crazy.

[ cuckoo clock chimes ] >> now that we have a democratic supermajority in california, there is a good chance this might pass. >> stephanie: then i'll go out on a limb and say gun deaths will drop a lot. once again absolutely no connection. all right, 58 minutes after the hour. eric boehlert next with right wing next on "the stephanie miller show."

[ ♪ theme ♪ ] >> stephanie: jacki schechner bff in the current news center.

did you hear the compliments for my new gel nails? >> i told you! >> stephanie: i know it. >> for people who don't understand what this is, i want to explain. so instead of getting the regular manicure where you get your nails painted with regular polish. >> stephanie: it chips in a couple of days. >> it is a different kind of polish that they solidify with a uv light and it lasts two to three weeks. and i've been doing it for awhile. it doesn't do any damage to my nails. >> stephanie: i'm not a real girl. normally like you and melissa. so i was like what? okay, i'll try it. >> it is good because melissa and i are rough on our hands too. i just introduced her to it. >> stephanie: i'm like a dockworker. i don't know what i do with my hands. >> you're like a farmer. >> stephanie: like a migrant farmer. i'm rough on my nails. >> here in california, there are a lot of cheap nail places and they don't charge considerably more for it. >> stephanie: girl tips with jacki schechner. >> you don't get a lot of estrogen over there. thought i would inject a little. >> stephanie: the girliest

girl in the world, jacki schechner. >> hardly. as steph mentioned, it is state of the union week. tomorrow night the president's going to give his address to a joint session of congress and the american people. the most immediate issue is the upcoming sequestration that is the automatic spending cuts that are set to kick in march 1st unless the president and congress can work out a deal. climate change, jobs immigration reform and new gun safety legislation all atop the president's domestic agenda. on the national security front expect the president to bring up global nuclear arms reduction. in 2009, the senate approved a strategic arms reduction treaty with russia that would bring the nuclear arsenal from 1700 down to about 1550 when it comes to deployed weapons by the year 2018. "new york times" reports today says the white house goal is to get the number closer to 1,000 which would save us some money and not compromise our national security. this week, the president also planning to issue a directive to combat cyberattacks. he would give companies that

control the nation's critical infrastructure access to a program that's designed to protect defense contractors. also, he would require government agencies that find out about possible cyberattacks to report those to outside companies. the white house and outside supporters are planning an online outreach and fund-raising campaign around the state of the union address. president's going to do a conference call with organizing for america's supporters after the state of the union tuesday night. he's going to do a google hangout on line to answer questions on thursday. we're back after the break. compelling true stories. >> jack, how old are you? >> nine. >> this is what 27 tons of marijuana looks like. (vo) with award winning documentaries that take you inside the headlines, way inside. (vo) from the underworld, to the world of privilege. >> everyone in michael jackson's life was out to use him. (vo) no one brings you more documentaries that are real, gripping, current.

>> announcer: ladies and gentlemen, it's "the stephanie miller show." ♪ i'm walkin' on sunshine ♪

♪ ate time to feel good ♪ >> stephanie: whatever manicure mr. blackwell. he said i would go with a more subdued color next time. [ whatever! ] >> what time would eric cantor picked. >> it is like you dipped your fingernails in pepto-bismol. >> your fingers are going to be constipated now. >> stephanie: shut up. guys hash tag obama quester seriously. that is supposed to be a thing? it sounds like a group of junior high focus groups threw their ideas in a hay bailer. republicans. same thing. [ applause ] you know i'm not just a woman. i'm a podcast and an app. tracy in new jersey. i'm a podcaster subscriber. i have no fear of commitment. i buy a year in advance. $4.95 a month if you buy a year in advance.

if you have a fear of commitment, it is only $7.95 a month. kristin gets to see me live. i'm a live show and a dessert topping. i'm so excited to be returning to sexy liberal with my husband. april 13th, chicago theatre. we'll be bringing some virgins. >> stephanie: ooh, sexy liberal virgins will be sacrificed at the show. [ applause ] >> there's no volcano. in cook county. >> in chicagoland. >> greater chicagoland does not have any volcanos. at the present time. >> stephanie: it's monday. you know what that means. eric boehlert from media matters for america doing the lord's work as usual. ♪ eric boehlert ♪ ♪ hurts so good ♪ ♪ come on, baby ♪ >> eric boehlert ♪ let's dive into the right-wing world. >> i don't know what that means. >> good morning, eric boehlert. >> good morning. >> stephanie: can i just say

my weekend as you know consists of a box of wine and eric boehlert tweets. this weekend however, every one of your tweets was spectacular i must say. nra wants armed cops in 98,000 schools. has the nra commented on the l.a. cop terrorizing cops? >> it is the whole good guys, bad guys. it is such an embarrassingly unsophisticated way to go about gun control. if you have a gun and we like you, you're a good guy but -- >> stephanie: it is a story about a good guy with a gun can become a bad guy with a gun. >> if you just look at the depressing laundry list of shooting victims every day you know america gun violence is basically american shooting relatives and boyfriends and girlfriends. that is a huge chunk of gun violence. and so how are you supposed to

determine the good guys and bad guys? they're all good guys before they start shooting people, basically. >> stephanie:s as you allude to, until somebody gets drunk or angry. at any rate, you write it is odd how right wing views bush in a good way but defines obama in a bad way through the benghazi terror attacks. incredible. >> also tweeted this morning said something like call me crazy but i think the g.o.p. is laying the ground work for benghazi to be the centerpiece of the 2016 campaign. >> stephanie: i heard someone in the drone discussion saying obama kept us safe and bush kept us safe except for that one time. >> it is amazing. the benghazi story won't go away. it has taken on such a larger than life -- it encompasses everything the right wing feels about obama and he's not like us. he doesn't protect us. it is about the sad scary

incident of four americans who are killed in a terrorist attack. and it is just funny. i happened to be doing some research. i was going back and looking at some of the -- you know, coverage a decade ago from 9-11 and iraq war. and time and again you know, 9-11 was pointed to as bush's crowning achievement. this was something to be incredibly proud of. he stepped up. this was leadership. so allowing 3,000 americans to be killed by -- is leadership. being associated with four americans in benghazi is an incredible failure on obama's part. it is just amazing. >> stephanie: the other great point you make is another benghazi hearing was it as informative as the one following the nine u.s. embassies consulate attacks hash tag never mind. there's just no context. nine u.s. embassies in consulate attacked during bush.

if you want to go back further into context in an 18-month period when reagan was president, three separate u.s. embassies or barracks were attacked in beirut. over 300 americans were killed. not just the marines but others. >> stephanie: right. >> 18 months. after the third one reagan campaigned in iowa the next day. reporters asked him did you think about not campaigning today. he said no. we need to campaign today. so you know, the double standard throughout history is so glaring and there were no hearings, of course, during the bush years when embassies and consulates were attacked. >> most upset about benghazi are the people who voted for -- for embassy security. >> and -- the republican party -- everyone forgets about this now. that try to block the 9-11 commission investigation. dick cheney was on the phone with daschle, with democrats saying this investigation is not

going to happen. >> yep. >> and now you know, we need 19 hearings. >> stephanie: by the way, so rubio obviously will give the response to the state of the union. in the last four years rubio's been for immigration reform as florida house speaker. against it as florida candidate and for it now with florida senator hash tag courage. they have their next flip-flopper to run for president. >> he's on the cover of "time" magazine. the republican savior. i think there's one or two sentences, even passing references in that very soft time cover story about how rubio has evolved on immigration. look, when he was -- when he was a republican speaker of the house in florida, he was very frankly liberal when it came to immigrations, not interested in these right wing talk about crackdowns. he ran for senate. everything changed. he ran so far to the right of christie and now he decides well republicans can't win

national election. he runs back to his previous position. that's sort of the definition of classic flip-flop. traditionally. is something to be -- held up as ridiculed. no, no no. he's the republican savior. he's smart. he's savvy. >> stephanie: eric, before we dive into right-wing world speaking of disarray. as the g.o.p. splits, whose side is fox news on. is it is interesting. as a tv home base for rove in one of the earliest supporters of the tea party's crusade fox news has one foot planted in each of the warring camps and finds itself having to navigate the name-calling. they did part ways with sarah palin and dick morris but they signed up a tea party guy. where are they in this interparty battle? >> he was having -- eric was having these war of words are karl rove and the tea party said karl rove is an elitist and he's out of touch. where are they? they're right in the middle.

my main point is this is not what fox does. fox news is not designed to air out public hearings about what is the true meaning of conservativism. it is not, you know, this sort of open forum where everyone gets their point of view. fox news is designed to, as a heat seeking missle to smear democrats. that's how they get their good ratings, short term programming. that's their sort of dna. i don't think fox is going to be doing a very good job in navigating a civil war because that's not what their viewers are interested in. but there's already rumblings on the right. the tea party with fox's close association with karl rove and how they allow this -- you know, this symbol of the republican elite to always be on fox and trash the tea party. so they -- you know, they are caught in the middle. >> stephanie: right. >> i don't think navigating it is going to do them any good. >> stephanie: it is like a

right wing wacko kind of monster truck -- i don't know. xxx games. let's dive in. >> xxx games? x games. >> that's different. >> stephanie: that's entirely different. okay. it is right wing porn. >> look how awesome it is in color. >> i think karl needs to go through a metamorphosis. this idea that somehow a handful of republicans are going to attack republicans that the handful doesn't like i find that repulsive. i find it absolutely repulsive. this is not how you build a strong republican party. it is by going after the people in your party who are different than you are. this is frat ra side. if they want to render itself utterly irrelevant, the best way to do it is to become several little parties within the party. >> stephanie: that just illustrated your whole piece didn't it? >> it is funny. now karl rove is starting to understand what it is like to be the target of this right wing

noise machine. there was some posts online. karl rove is lying. he never worked for the reagan campaign. and you know, now huckabee is do offing the name-calling. mark levine was doing the name-calling. there is no rational discussion. if you're karl rove and you oppose these people, i think he's done it in a fairly high-minded way you know, he hasn't done the name-calling. they just come back with attacks. he's ruined -- not only is he ruining the party but you know, he's an elite. he's lying about his record. et cetera, et cetera. so it is always nice to -- when folks on the right actually goat appreciate and experience what it's like to be the target of these right wing -- >> stephanie: welcome to our world. >> four years for karl rove. >> stephanie: all right bill crystal on fox news sunday. >> democrats. >> this is not a matter of politics. this is going to gut our defenses. if you are responsible president, you don't have to save $45 billion this year.

that's 4% of the deficit. we're going to endanger our national defenses and shortchange our servicemen and women overseas for the sake of cutting 4% from this year's deficit? it is totally irresponsible. >> stephanie: wow. deficits don't matter again. >> that's a good point. deficits are this -- you know, this sort of murderous ominous thing that is hanging over the generations and obama doesn't care about the future generations. there are actual cuts. but look, crystal he uses this card all the time. he wrote a column last week saying if democrats don't vote against chuck hagel they're endangering our troops. we want to have some -- cutting that republicans claim we have to do, they're endangering our troops. >> stephanie: all right. hang on, eric remains in the side sidecar. we continue more right-wing world. it is "the stephanie miller show." >> announcer: there's a tea

party in her pants and you're invited. call now. 1-800-steph-12. with the know how we need for a new tomorrow. [ male announcer ] make sure america's ready. make sure you're ready. at devry.edu. ♪ ♪ [ piano plays ] troy polamalu's going deeper. ♪ ♪ and so is head & shoulders deep clean. [ male announcer ] with 7 benefits it goes deep to remove grease, gunk and flakes. deep. like me. [ male announcer ] head & shoulders deep clean for men. ♪ ♪

from silver screens... to flat screens... twizzlerize your entertainment everyday with twizzlers the twist you can't resist.

you've heard stephanie's views. >>no bs, authentic, the real thing. >>now, let's hear yours at the only online forum with a direct line to stephanie miller. >>the only thing that can save america now: current television. >>join the debate now.

♪ whoa, you've got best of my ♪ >> stephanie miller. ♪ you've got best of ♪ >> stephanie miller. >> stephanie: it is "the stephanie miller show." 22 minutes after the hour. 1-800-steph-12 the phone number. eric boehlert from media matters rejoins us for right-wing world. oh, just in time for rush limbaugh. >> i remember being laughed at and mocked and being an extremist for predicting that

definitions of family, what constitutes family is now wide open and pretty soon you're going to be able to marry your dog. your dog is going to be an official member of the family, qualifies for benefits, people laughed and made fun of me. here we go. miami-david circuit judge oks a plan for a gay guy and lesbian couple to be on a daughter's birth seth even though one of the lesbians had nothing to do with it. >> so that equates people marrying their dogs? >> stephanie: where do the dogs come in there? >> who let the dogs in? >> stephanie: can i marry max? >> if you don't see the connection, then you don't understand rush's world views. >> wow. >> stephanie: all right. ted nugent on world net daily radio. that's gotta be a reasonable discussion. >> it really is a nation divided and it's never been more divided. the racism that president obama and eric gun-running holder promote is just heartbreaking.

and it's tragic. and those of us that know better have got to constantly expose their scams and their racist agenda. >> stephanie: oh, my god. really? i haven't heard that. that's a new one. >> well, two things. there's a new interview out with a new republic with roger ailes mostly talking about what they're going to do with immigration on the channel. but he's deploring about how obama has been trying to get poor people to hate rich people and blacks to hate whites. so this is definitely -- we've obviously heard this for four years. obama is trying to start the race war. and now we have the chairman of fox news going on the record, you know, claiming that obama wants blacks to hate whites. second part is why every time i turn on cnn am i seeing ted nugent? i know that interview was from a crazy right wing radio show. but last week, you know, he

became like their in-house gun expert. come on. >> stephanie: eric, everyone deserves a spot at the table. no! all right. greg gutfield on the five. >> every student should stick the expensive colleges on loans. they need to learn the obscure term that's called capitalism and they gotta pay for the fact they've been churning out lazy, stupid marxists every four years. puts social justice before payback alone. how do you solve this problem? you force all of the marxist professors to be in charge of debt collection. they gotta go out and if they don't get the loans back, they don't get their salaries. that's my solution. they'll become capitalists before you can say -- >> slimy little turd that guy is. >> stephanie: jim louise ward! [ buzzer ] >> even though gutfield is not that old. he sounds like one of the

classic, cranky old men on fox. the kids today coming out of college. they wonder why the average fox viewer is like 72 years old. >> stephanie: all right. we end with chris wallace and mike gallagher on the gallagher radio program. >> nancy pelosi, we'll be talking to her about the president's agenda. you'll want to watch that. >> can i give you some career advice. a little career advice. you want to continue in this business. be a little rough on nancy pelosi please. give people hope. i hope that means you're going to crucify -- >> oh really? would you stop it? >> throw a bucket of water on her and see what happens. throw a bucket of water on her. i'll bet she melts. >> stephanie: wicked witch humor. okay. >> you know, i know he makes the rounds to drum up business for the sunday show which is dead last and always has been. but you know, he appears on a show like thafnlt he appears oh, stop it. why are you making those cracks? they do it all the time. chris wallace is supposed to be the last sort of serious

journalist in the fox news umbrella. it is just embarrassing. >> stephanie: all right. well said. eric boehlert for media matters. see you next week, honey. >> all right bye. [ applause ] >> we will be on next week. next monday. i know is a holiday. we'll be giving you a fresh live show. >> stephanie: enjoy. >> sara in colorado. >> good morning, folks. how are you doing? >> caller: your nails are pretty too if i can put my 2 cents in. >> i have a couple of things. i don't want to take up your time. i want to get somebody else. i have a few topics i would like to speak about. may i? >> stephanie: okay. >> caller: mother, may i? >> stephanie: yes, go ahead. >> caller: did you folks see dr. carson the other day, the national prayer breakfast? >> stephanie: no. >> caller: it has been a big thing. did you see him? >> stephanie: no i did not. >> caller: did your other staff see him? he was right on target and he had obama squirming in his seat. when he was talking about.

i was happy to see that. >> stephanie: what was he talking about? >> caller: he was talking about taxes, fairness, we should tithe and be fair. that we've got a definite that won't quit. let's face it. >> stephanie: you mean deficit? >> caller: the deficit. i'm sorry. >> stephanie: uh-huh. >> caller: the other thing in my laundry basket -- >> stephanie: did the president say he's against tithing? >> caller: no, dr. carson said that we should be tithing as opposed to this class warfare. >> stephanie: as opposed to paying taxes sure. that would work. >> caller: i don't know what the fair share is. >> stephanie: that wouldn't contribute to the deficit at all. if we didn't pay taxes we don't tithe. >> not all of us go to church. >> caller: well, here's another thing i would like to say if i may. >> stephanie: run this one up your flagpole. go ahead sara. >> caller: thank you. i was appalled. please don't be angry with me because i'm neither republican or democrat. >> stephanie: you're an

independent and you stumbled across my show. >> caller: yes, i am independent. i don't know if that means anything but stephanie, i was very appalled when hillary clinton said what difference does it make after four people have died. >> stephanie: that wasn't what she -- turn on fox news. that wasn't what she said. she didn't say what difference did it make if people died. i'll bet you she's a small business owner. 29 minutes after the hour. right back on "the stephanie miller show." going to do the young turks. i think the number one thing that viewers like about the young turks is that we're honest. they know that i'm not bs'ing them with some hidden agenda, actually supporting one party or the other. when the democrats are wrong, they know that i'm going to be the first one to call them out. they can question whether i'm right, but i think that the audience gets that this guy, to the best of his ability, is trying to look out for us.

>> oh look. >> stephanie miller. >> hello mr. beaver. >> stephanie: howdy. it is "the stephanie miller show." welcome to it. 34 minutes after the hour.

1-800-steph-12 the phone number toll free from anywhere. jessica in maine, you're on "the stephanie miller show." welcome. hello, jess. >> caller: hi. >> stephanie: hi, go ahead. >> caller: two things. one not so serious and one serious. not as serious as how to get through nemo, go to a high school reunion with friends and drink all weekend. but the serious thing is with the sequester when that goes into effect march 1st, it is not like the fiscal cliff that we went over for a day or two and backed off. once it goes into effect, that means that -- i know a lot of people who work for the department of defense that all civilian employees will have to -- will only be allowed to work four days a week, take a 20% pay cut and that lasts through september 30th, the end of the fiscal year. once it goes in, it's done and there's no changing it. >> stephanie: mm-hmm, yep. >> caller: all of these people you know, like people who got kids that they signed up for college and now they have to

refile them because they got a whole lot less income and they'll still be expected to do all of the work they're supposed to do, supporting, you know, the active duty military who are on 24/7 but they're only allowed 32 hours a week. >> stephanie: absolutely. good points, jess. >> caller: take care. >> stephanie: okay then, bye-bye. let's go to jared in illinois. you're on "the stephanie miller show." hello, jared. >> caller: hey, how are you doing? >> stephanie: good. go ahead. >> caller: i've heard so much about this deficit. i'm a 24-year-old professional myself. and i'm really glad that the president is doing and taking steps to help reduce the deficit but really, it is not -- 4% isn't going to make a difference. we spend more on our military defense than the top 20 nations combined. and it is unsustainable. i feel bad for the people who work at the department of defense or as they used to call it, the department of war because we use terms for

warmongering instead of peace. it is unsustainable. my generation, the 24-year-olds won't have social security or the safety net we're paying into but taxes keep going up. i feel bad because there's literally and financially no way out of this deficit. it is unsustainable. >> 4% is a few drops in the bucket though. once you get enough drops, you can empty the bucket. >> caller: the point of it is that president obama -- you know again he's making great strides. the president has inherited a lot of bad things but when you're looking at a $15 $16 trillion and you're cutting a couple billion over ten years that's just paying the interest. it is like a mortgage on a house. if you have $150,000 loan and you're only paying the minimum payments, you're going to be stuck on that and you're never going to be able to pay it off. >> defense cuts are one part of a bunch of things. >> stephanie: obviously, that's why -- >> tax on social security. >> stephanie: revenue from

taxes. it is not do-able without that. our friend paul krugman was on yesterday. as well, saying once again, this is the austerity is the absolute last thing you should do right now. >> pentagon cuts should not be off the table. >> stephanie: roberta in washington, d.c. hello, roberta. >> caller: hi, how are you? >> stephanie: good. go ahead. >> caller: i was calling in. i enjoy your show for -- well, about a year or so ago we discovered you. any way, just wanted to let you know that we have come up with an idea to defend against republicans. it is a mirror. hold it up to all republicans speaking and know that what they say reflects back on them. it is them they're talking about. >> stephanie: it is the i know you are but what am i strategy. >> caller: that's exactly it. they simply -- everything they say about democrats or

independents really is what applies to them. >> stephanie: yep. >> caller: that's pretty much what my defense mechanism and i'm here in the land of taxation without representation. >> stephanie: d.c. oh you seem happy giddy about it. i'm going to give you a $50 pro flowers gift card for your trouble. >> caller: thank you, stephanie. we love you. >> stephanie: hang on. $50 pro flowers gift card. if you're looking for flowers for valentine's day on thursday. type in stephanie. do it. >> easy peasy lemon squeezy. >> stephanie: right-wing world. don't tell fox news they have a picture of a lesbian couple for gender roles. it looks like a dude. >> it is two chicks. >> that's great. >> stephanie: fox news column

about traditional gender roles in marriages accidentally with a photograph of two lesbian newlyweds exchanging a kiss. fox news.com column written by suzanne banker. the niece of phyllis. previous author, remember that column jacki and i talked about. all women's fault there is a battle of the sexes. that girl. her latest column titled to be happy. the men and women are not equal. they have no idea who's to do what because of feminists who preach a new way of thinking about gender. then the picture of the aforementioned lesbian brides kissing. [ ♪ nah nah nah nah nah ♪ ] >> lovely tuxedo she's wearing though. >> stephanie: oops! [ laughter ] lee in oregon, you're on "the stephanie miller show." hi lee. >> caller: good morning, stephanie. i would like to bring up one point that i haven't heard yet about the post office. >> stephanie: uh-huh.

>> caller: we know about the prefunding of retirement. we know about having to stick to cost of living and no more in raises. but we also -- what we don't talk about is that when postal workers start being laid off say the first 25,000, then we are going to start paying taxes for their unemployment insurance. >> stephanie: right. >> caller: when we start laying off postal workers then it will start costing us taxes which it doesn't now. >> stephanie: that's a good point. >> i don't understand the republicans obsession with destroying the post office. which is mandated by the constitution. >> stephanie: pretty good deal by the way. 42 centss to send a letter. >> oh, honey. bless your heart. 46 or 47 cents now. >> stephanie: right. it's gone up a few times. [ ♪ magic wand ♪ ] >> people who live in rural

areas -- >> you hand it to travis. >> stephanie: i give him s & h green stamps. s & m green stamps. >> stephanie: bless my heart. [ wah wah ] [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] president obama's nominee would be the first to openly gay federal court of appeals judge. >> sweet. >> stephanie: since taking office president obama has quadrupled the number of gay benches on his -- gay judges on his bench. in his first term, although -- never mind -- just saying, didn't justice suitor live with his mom? [ buzzer ] okay. in his first term, president obama nominated openly gay attorney edward dumont to serve on the united states court of appeals for the federal circuit but dumont eventually withdrew his nomination after 18 months of one or more members of the senate judiciary committee

republicans, obstructing his confirmation. yesterday, president took another shot at placing an openly gay judge nominating todd hughes to fill a seat on the federal circuit. [ applause ] yea! >> somebody who should have made right-wing world today is joe walsh. >> stephanie: no. tea party guy from illinois who lost. >> going after michelle obama for attending the funeral of pendleton. heartbroken with quotation marks. i guess the other 553 murder victims didn't break her heart. >> stephanie: he's just a jerk. ♪ you are an idiot ha, ha, ha, ha, ha ha, ha, ha, ha, ha ♪ >> he farted. >> stephanie: seriously, you know what? there is a family in pain. really? you need to tweet about that subject? because yeah. okay. the girl just performed at the inaugural parade.

>> he's claiming that michelle obama's politicizing it. wow. look in the mirror, pal. >> stephanie: all right. i was mentioning this earlier. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] oddly, coincidentally, the state with the most amount of guns and the laxest gun laws somehow have the highest per capita gun deaths. weird. >> proof they don't have enough guns. >> stephanie: a group of california senate democrats rolled out a regulation that would be the tightest gun regulation in the nation. fun facts. number one ban all semi-automatic weapons that have detachable magazines. ban possession of high-capacity magazines. ban bullet conversion kits. ban universal register -- require universal registration. prohibit individuals from living in homes with guns. cracking down on people who can't own guns legally but do anyway and require safety training for handgun owners.

oh the battle makes the gun nuts crazy. [ applause ] >> stephanie: we were saying this is -- the headline is democrats hug second amendment while rolling out gun plan. members of the house democratic gun violence task force put a heavy manufacture sis on gun -- emphasis on gun recommendations. i think there is this aftershock of having to be afraid of the second amendment. love my gun. speaking directly to hunters to telling the personal story of a family defended from roving bans of racist thugs. they promise they won't touch it as they work to reduce gun violence after the newtown connecticut, school massacre. >> i really think they should enforce the third amendment. there is rampant housing of red coats and that needs to stop. >> stephanie: jesse in south carolina you're on "the stephanie miller show." hello, jess.

jesse? okay. joe in minnesota. hi joe. >> caller: hi. yeah, i'm just a little kind of irritated with your young professional that calls who keeps saying how services go down and our taxes go up when, in fact, our taxes are the lowest they've been since well before that idiot was even born. >> stephanie: thank you. that professional idiot. all right. 45 minutes after the hour. right back on "the stephanie miller show." >> announcer: she's the life of the democratic party. ignore the lampshade. it's "the stephanie miller show."

[ male announcer ] to many men, shaving can be a sensitive issue. but take comfort. it may not be you; it may be your razor. upgrade to gillette fusion proglide. our micro-thin blades are thinner than a surgeon's scalpel to put less stress on your skin by gliding through hair.

switch to fusion proglide. number one dermatologist recommended on sensitive skin. and now introducing new fusion proglide sensitive shave gel. gillette. the best a man can get. [ lisa ] my name's lisa, and chantix helped me quit. i honestly loved smoking and i honestly didn't think i would ever quit. [ male announcer ] along with support chantix is proven to help people quit smoking. it reduces the urge to smoke. it put me at ease that you could smoke on the first week. [ male announcer ] some people had changes in behavior, thinking or mood hostility, agitation depressed mood and suicidal thoughts or actions while taking or after stopping chantix. if you notice any of these stop taking chantix and call your doctor right away. tell your doctor about any history of depression or other mental health problems which could get worse while taking chantix. don't take chantix if you've had a serious allergic or skin reaction to it. if you develop these stop taking chantix and see your doctor right away as some can be life-threatening. if you have a history of heart or blood vessel problems tell your doctor if you have new or worse symptoms. get medical help right away if you have symptoms of a heart

attack. use caution when driving or operating machinery. common side effects include nausea trouble sleeping and unusual dreams. with chantix and with the support system it worked. it worked for me. [ male announcer ] ask your doctor if chantix is right for you. he was a fashion icon living a beautiful life until a chance encounter took it all away. of all the hours in all his days, these are the ones you'll never forget.

>> stephanie miller. ♪ daisy dukes bikinis on top ♪ ♪ sun kissed skin so hot will melt your popsicle ♪ ♪ oh, oh ♪ >> stephanie: we're officially old. jim's like i tried to watch the grammys. i don't know who they are. >> you like mumford & sons. they won best album. >> stephanie: i tried to. >> loud. >> stephanie: gotye. i know that song. ♪ somebody that i used to know ♪ >> you know "we are young." >> stephanie: sure. >> except the guy just admitted that they're really not that young anymore. they've been doing that for 12 years. ♪ we are young" by fun. >> don't make me play it for you. >> stephanie: i don't know. okay. >> here, here, here. >> stephanie: oh for god's

sake. >> that's not it. >> stephanie: i know that. >> you know that one? >> stephanie: no i don't know that one either. >> stephanie: is this it? >> that's not it. >> stephanie: all right. just stop. before you hurt yourself. >> this is it. ♪ give me a second, i need to ♪ >> stephanie: oh, i like that song! i love that song. >> they won two grammys last night. [ applause ] >> stephanie: okay, got it. donna in kansas. you're on "the stephanie miller show." hi donna. >> caller: hi. you were wondering awhile ago about why the republicans were going after the post office. it is because they want to destroy the postal worker's union. >> stephanie: there is also some anti-union thing in there isn't there? >> caller: yeah. postal worker's union is one of the strongest in government. and well, republicans are just trying to destroy unions. that's why nobody was happy on the republican side when obama

saved the autoworkers. >> stephanie: absolutely. you're the smartest girl in class. guess what you get. sherrie's berries. giant freshly dipped berries. type in the code stephanie. they're ginormous. like a baby's first or a really large brussels sprouts. >> only they're a million times better. >> especially with the decorative drizzle. >> stephanie: fershizzle. we were talking to eric boehlert. can fox news break its fatal embrace with the republican party? it is just so much fun the disarray stories. she writes in the guardian after a decade of phenomenal ratings growth, they face a crisis of ideological identity. recent headlines about fox news have given liberals gleeful shots.

lowest since 2001. the marriage between the network and party has been almost entirely beneficial to both entities working together brazenly even explicitly so has been a message for the brand. it is a love story gone wrong. isn't it sad? morris and palin suggest fox is loosening its grip and attempting to edge away from the tea party based ideology but almost simultaneously, republicans have been thinking about breaking away from their dependence on the network. it is a who's breaking up with who network. how are the different demographics going to know you if you don't reach out to them. no matter who may be ending the marriage first extricating the relationship won't be graceful. >> stephanie: there will be drunk dialing and drunk e-mails in the middle of the night. >> throw cds on to the front

porch. >> stephanie: probably every morning, there is a drunken message from clarence thomas' wife. positive feedback spirals into irrelevance, republicans pursue a conspiracy theory that only fox airs. new information gets hammered into a shape that fits the existing narrative. oh, how will it all end? another love story gone wrong. >> speaking of love stories gone wrong, i think taylor swift has jumped the snark. mocking harry styles, her recent -- >> from one direction. >> mocking sort of quasi-british accent. >> then there was katy perry's boobs. >> slow motion carpet commercial. no! you're going to end up as a song. don't! >> stephanie: jesse -- >> it's a cookbook. [ laughter ] >> stephanie: jesse in north carolina. hi jess. >> caller: hey steph. >> stephanie: hello. >> caller: two quick things. first of all, post office, they

continue to do this. what they're really doing is disenfranchising the community. the only way post office can continue to maintain supremacy is to enforce a monopoly. that's the only way they can compete against fedex and u.p.s. >> stephanie: did you know that fedex uses the post office for some of their deliveries. >> they do. imagine the irony there. second of all i just want to say that you know, i saw your show last year. i loved it. i love you and i'm mildly obsessed with you. >> uh-oh. >> stephanie: who? oh me. awesome. i will settle for a gift card instead. >> stephanie: i'm all out today but try again tomorrow. >> caller: no. tomorrow? >> we'll give away two more tomorrow. >> stephanie: john in st. louis, hello john. >> caller: hi, stephanie. how is it going? >> stephanie: good. >> caller: i want to get your take on the administration's rationalization of strikes overseas on american citizens. >> stephanie: uh-huh. >> what about it?

>> caller: i apologize. i haven't really -- >> stephanie: you stumbled upon the show? >> caller: yeah, i listen to a lot of conservative radio. [ ♪ hypnotic ♪ ] >> stephanie: you're an independent and you listen to both sides. robert gates on the drone situation. >> first of all, the numbers i believe are extremely small. and second, you do have the ability to limit that collateral damage more than with any other weapon system that you have. >> stephanie: hello stephanie. i'm an independent. i've stumbled across your show and i said the same thing when george bush was doing it. i wonder how you would answer on this issue. i'll take your answer off air. >> liberals are upset about it. actual liberals. >> stephanie: senator john mccain. >> since when is the intelligence agency supposed to be an air force of drones that goes around killing people? i believe it is a job for the department of defense. >> good point. >> stephanie: that could be. >> the c.i.a. has been out of control in the past.

>> but as far as weapons systems go it does produce a lot less collateral damage than a missile. >> they use hell fire missile drones. >> stephanie: that's what we were saying, the gun nuts think that's the only regulation. we should all be able to have a drone. >> they're upset with julian for reporting the killings of the journalists. they thought people shouldn't be allowed to see that. i think we should. we have to know what we're paying for. >> stephanie: oh, by the way. >> wheel of right wing hypocrites. >> stephanie: ron paul wants ronpaul.com so badly. he's asking the u.n., which he's against, for help. against his own supporters. a group behind the site announced he filed a complaint with the intellectual property organization, a global governing body, an agency at the u.n. to expropriate the two domain names from his supporters. that is fabulous!

[ laughter ] >> he tried to use the free market. he didn't like the price he was offered then he went to the u.n. [baby crying] >> i want to get rid of the fire department. oh, my house is on fire. why won't you put it out? >> stephanie: 58 minutes after the hour. right back on "the stephanie miller show."

[ ♪ theme ♪ ] >> stephanie: hello current tv world. hour number three. jacki schechner. >> good morning.

>> stephanie: did you see the subject you're not helping. jacki schechner piece was that suzanne, the fox news writer. it is always women's fault. the battle of the sexes and blah blah, blah. she wrote a piece on traditional marriage and she accidentally included a picture of a lesbian couple. >> i saw the picture online. i didn't know that that was attached to another gem by her. >> stephanie: it was two lesbians at their wedding picture. >> i did see the picture. somebody put it on facebook. that was fabulous. >> stephanie: anything to be a fly on the wall when she found that out. [ screaming ] >> stephanie: there is a picture of a -- >> that has to be a fox mistake. a fox.com mistake. she wouldn't have chosen the photo for that. >> stephanie: they're so rare, the fox mistakes. >> that would have been an editorial mistake on the fox.com side. couldn't happen to a better woman as far as i'm concerned. >> stephanie: jacki schechner in the current news center. >> good morning, everybody. former congresswoman gabby giffords is now narrating and starring in a new tv ad that

will air on national cable this week. and in the four states in districts with the top four congressional leaders, that would be those of senators reed and mcconnell and representatives boehner and pelosi. americans for responsible solutions is behind the ad. that's the super pac that giffords and her husband mark kelly started to advocate for new gun safety legislation. in the ad, giffords says where we shop, pray and our kids go to school and there are solutions that everyone, even gun owners like them can agree on like universal background checks. >> take it from me. congress must act. let's get this done. >> giffords is still recovering from being shot in the head on january 2011 at a campaign event. the senate is expected to pass the re-authorization of the violence against women act either this afternoon or tomorrow. the final version includes provisions that would expand protections to gay people, undocumented immigrants and native americans. the house republicans are stalling and there's no indication that they plan to

move forward on the bill. and "esquire" magazine has interviewed the navy seal who shot osama bin laden. protecting his identification. now online indefinitely worth a read. not only details the mission but also the challenges he is facing now that he's left the service after 16 years. he fell short of the 20 years that were required to hit official retirement. those challenges include the fact that he no longer has health insurance. that stops the day he left. we're back with more after the break. stay with us. (vo) next, current tv is the place for compelling true stories. >> jack, how old are you? >> nine. >> this is what 27 tons of marijuana looks like. (vo) with award winning documentaries that take you inside the headlines, way inside. (vo) from the underworld, to the world of privilege. >> everyone in michael jackson's life was out to use him. (vo) no one brings you more documentaries that are real, gripping, current.

what we need are people prepared for the careers of our new economy. by 2025 we could have 20 million jobs without enough college graduates to fill them. that's why at devry university we're teaming up with companies like cisco to help make sure everyone's ready with the know how we need for a new tomorrow. [ male announcer ] make sure america's ready. make sure you're ready. at devry.edu. ♪ ♪

>> announcer: ladies and gentlemen, it's "the stephanie miller show." ♪ i'm walk on sunshine ♪

♪ i'm walkin' on sunshine ♪ ♪ and it's time to feel good ♪ ♪ hey, all right now ♪ ♪ and it's time to feel good ♪ >> stephanie: it is "the stephanie miller show." welcome to it. six minutes after the hour. oh davis from north carolina writes how will it end? the fox g.o.p. war. you just read from an article from annmarie cox that ended with the question how will it end? i'm guessing it will be like "war of the roses." >> dick morris will be crushed under a giant chandelier. >> sarah palin is on top of the chandelier. okay. it is a love letter for hal. kathy writes how can you sit so close to hal sparks every wednesday and not get tingly all over. >> stephanie: i do. that's the day i go to questioning. >> i just saw him at the icehouse. he is dreamy. [ applause ] >> stephanie: guess where you can see him live. >> hey chicago you say twice isn't enough. >> 15 is my limit.

>> the stephanie miller sexy liberal comedy tour is returning to chicago. >> bad attitudes! >> tickets are available at ticketmaster.com. come see the tour that sparked the number one comedy album and its own tv documentary. >> who can argue with that? >> the sexy liberal comedy tour at the chicago theatre on april 13th. sweet home chicago is about to get a little more sugar from mama. >> stephanie: yea. tickets going fast. get it, go. one of the only three shows this year. that's the big midwestern show. then there will be a west coast show later in the year. that's it. go, get it! >> what cities? >> stephanie: we don't know. >> really? >> stephanie: now that i've seen it, it's he gree with chris. steph, your ass is spectacular. >> see, i've been saying that for eight years. >> stephanie: where is the ass cam today? hello. >> why don't you get up and show people. >> stephanie: stop it. people on the radio will be jealous. okay.

all right and oh, one more. another love letter. thank you. mary in tucson, mama, forwarding a copy of what just appeared on the list of daily coast. it praises stephanie miller. i know you describe your show as a mensa meeting with farther folks but understand what you and the mooks don't is important. you bring comfort to folks who are facing a variety of situations. this is powerful because it makes us feel stronger. somebody named boilerman. very cute. one day current tv picked up stephanie miller. it was like a magnificent dawn and a blast of fresh air. [farting sounds] >> fresh methane. >> stephanie: very sweet. he writes stephanie miller has helped me and her crew have helped me in dealing with my cancer, taking my mind off the problem. i thank her so much. whether it is providing politics or tomfoolery or having judy reminding us it could happen.

>> it could happen. >> stephanie: or running gags with chris and jacki and tales of her lonely life which sounds pretty damn active to me -- both active and lonely -- >> john fuglesang, hal sparks various calls that make the call a blast to listen to and it helps an old man with cancer. we love you! [ applause ] >> stephanie: by the way have i reminded you i'm not just a woman, i'm an app. >> you're awoman. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] >> sid in santa rosa, i had such a good time with you in vegas. you can take me anywhere with you. i'm a podcast i'm an app. i'm a contraceptive foam. >> you didn't bug me. >> stephanie: apparently we had a great time in vegas. >> you don't go to vegas a lot. >> stephanie: no but my app does. >> i can't picture you in vegas. >> stephanie: i hate vegas. i don't have the stomach for it. i lost a quarter in a slot machine once. i'm like i'm out.

>> there's other stuff to do there. >> stephanie: really? all right. rocky mountain mike by the way. we've been having an on-going debate about "zero dark thirty" like most movies, i fell asleep in the first ten minutes isn't i can't render a full opinion. rocky mountain mike said i think the movie clearly shows information that was very indirect in the discovery of bin laden's whereabouts. great movie making. he agrees with high-strung sexy liberal tour director, roland. >> i think if you have it on in the background as noise while you're cleaning the house or something, you might come to a conclusion that we got the information from torture. but if you look at it as -- if you look at it with some seriousness -- >> stephanie: i have to watch the whole thing and stay awake because as someone pointed out to me this weekend, i go to bed at the same time as babies and milk men. >> except all of the milk men retired 30 years ago. >> stephanie: one night i was

particularly tired. my friend was like -- my friends are still at work. really? you're going to bed? [ wah wah ] very sad. okay. okay. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] this is just -- a couple of quick stacks. i guess it is trial stacks. i hate when this happens jim. man's prosthetic eye falls out during trial. judge declares mistrial. >> oh! >> stephanie: if you're wondering how to get a mistrial, that would work. i'll never forget -- do you remember the caller i had on the evening show a thousand years ago. >> the guy whose eyes calcified and fell out of his head. >> stephanie: stephanie, both of my eyes have been calcified and have fallen out of my head. >> i didn't know that was possible. >> stephanie: during an assault trial a man's prosthetic eye fell from his eye. he testified about losing his left eye in a fight. he began to cry. it caused the glass eye to -- he

luckily caught the eye. good reflexes. good hand-eye coordination. [ ♪ circus ♪ ] several jury members rose. okay. i gotta -- i'm out. i got a thing with an eye. [ laughter ] >> stephanie: i should have done that during my brief you know appearance in court on my dog off a leash ticket to see if i could get out of that. you're really going to give me a ticket? >> he's a seeing eye -- okay. this one if you're eating, i would stop now. >> okay. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] jesse from iowa sends me -- husband stack for you. you know your mother loves you when she's willing to smuggle oxycodone where you're incarcerated especially when she passes the pills via an open-mouth kiss.

i just think i'm going to barf. wait until you see the pictures. >> blah! >> this is what the investigators allege transpired when she visited her offspring in upstate new york. her son was being held follows a weapons arrest according to the sheriff's report she put the objection joy codoan pills in her mouth and brought them into the jail. she passed two pills from her mouth to her son's mouth when she kissed him. >> she could have been carrying them somewhere else. >> i guess. >> stephanie: deputies did not indicate whether tongue was -- [ buzzer ] was involved in the transfer. >> one would expect because you would need to push the pills out and put them into another. the tongue would be used for that. >> stephanie: sorry. all right. sorry. >> naked handstands. >> stephanie: tony in north carolina, you're on "the stephanie miller show." hi tony. hello, tony. >> caller: how you doing?

>> stephanie: good, go ahead. >> caller: i think it should become a part -- it can't be a win-win for the democratic party because they have to come away with a packet and they're going to give the president everything he wants so i think the republican party -- in the bigger picture i think they'll admit the bigger picture. if it goes through, they have to come up with it. and they're going to get the democrat party and everything he wants at the end of the day. >> stephanie: i think so, too. as people keep pointing out there was an election and there was an election and everything david gregory says, yeah and there was an election. okay. anyone, all of those issues. okay. steve in north carolina. hi steve. welcome. >> caller: hi, stephanie. long time fan first time caller. your screener asked me just to throw one question. the first one is an easy one. if i could sneak the second one in, i would love it.

why doesn't anybody at these conferences when senator graham makes these statements, he'll say who voted to lower the funds to protect our embassies? simple yes or no. did you vote against -- for this to thing to lower the funds? and the other thing quickly -- >> stephanie: hillary clinton got that in, didn't she? >> she tried to. they were on top of her all the time. the other thing is i do -- right-wing world, down here, we have someone named doug gel et who is rational. he had a speaker on named bridget from america.org. and i mean she had a little bit of an accent, very articulate. she went off on where was obama born and the support of the muslims and he must be a muslim. have you ever heard of america.org? >> stephanie: no. i have not. i'm guessing it is some right wing whack thing. james in santa fe, new mexico, you're on "the stephanie miller show." welcome. >> caller: hi. i live in santa fe and i listen

to both left wing and right wing radios. [ ♪ hypnotic ♪ ] >> caller: i'm a gun owner. i found the fact that my city governor is sponsoring a taxpayer gun buyback to be offensive. >> stephanie: why would it be offensive? don't sell yours back then. >> caller: with my taxpayer -- my city government is paying for the obstruction of the constitution. >> stephanie: no, they're not. it is optional. you don't have to sell your gun back. >> caller: i don't have to sell my gun back but what it simultaneously does is wastes money that could be used for something else and makes us gun owners look like a bunch of criminals. >> stephanie: james i just did a story today. literally all of the states with the most guns and the most lax gun laws have the highest per capita gun deaths. you don't think there's any connection that maybe less -- some less guns in a buybacks accomplish that, that doesn't help in some way?

>> caller: google this. the number one safest city in the city has the laxest gun laws el paso texas. >> stephanie: has the laxest? >> where did you get these statistics? >> just google it. >> no, i'm asking you where you got the statistics. >> stephanie: you're saying it is the safest city? what's your point? >> caller: you're saying that basically places that -- i don't know like l.a. that has a lot of gun control is a safe city? it has no crime. >> stephanie: no. i'm saying per capita -- >> per capita, it is quite a bit smaller than l.a. >> google it. >> stephanie: okay. well, i've never been told that quite so aggressively. just saying, a red sox rookie just shot himself. red sox prospect bryce prince, oh dear, he actually -- shot himself. he was at home in tennessee cleaning a gun.

he's going to be fine but he did in fact -- >> oh, son of a bitch! ♪ i just [ bleep ] shot myself ♪ ♪ i just [ bleep ] shot myself ♪ ♪ i just [ bleep ] shot myself ♪ >> i think if you're going to own guns, you should be able to tell when there are no bullets in it. that step might be good. >> stephanie: can i just -- just briefly, i have to read a little of this. steph, this message i copy and pasted below was in my e-mail. this is the stuff that's out here. conspiracy stuff. overwhelming evidence has surfaced to prove that sandy hook is a hoax. the cnn helicopter footage was set somewhere else. the quote-unquote grieving parents are joyful during their interviews. >> what? >> stephanie: early footage from the earliest hours that makes it impossible for emergency vehicles to operate.

>> come on! >> stephanie: 19 minutes after the hour. right back on "the stephanie miller show." >> announcer: taking back god. taking back the flag. taking back america and all before breakfast it's "the stephanie miller show." payday. fill up and go! the natural energy of peanuts and delicious, soft caramel. to fill you up and keep you moving, whatever your moves. payday. fill up and go!

he was a fashion icon living a beautiful life until a chance encounter took it all away.

of all the hours in all his days, these are the ones you'll never forget. ♪ american woman ♪ ♪ stay away from me ♪ ♪ american woman ♪ >> stephanie miller. ♪ let me be ♪

>> stephanie: it is "the stephanie miller show." i'm new at this. 24 minutes after the hour. 1-800-steph-12 the phone number toll free from anywhere. greg, i believe is engaging in some snark. hello, stephanie i'm an independent caller. i'm disappointed with obama's lack of bipartisan by nominating only a few posts that are republicans and the one token george w. bush nominated to get the senate seat up. clearly, if he was bipartisan, why don't we have enough republican folk on the talk shows. can we add more? >> stephanie: i get it. it is snark. [ applause ] mike in florida you're on "the stephanie miller show." hi mike. >> caller: how you doing? >> stephanie: good. >> caller: i'm be honest. i grew up in new york. and in the '60s, the dope came into the neighborhoods.

it affected everybody and it also -- i had a friend of mine that sold dope in new york. he gave me a list of the judges and lawyers he was paying off. the same thing in congress. you trust a politician and today, the ends justify the means. and they get -- they don't serve the people. all they worry about is the next election. >> stephanie: who is the dope dealer in this analogy? >> caller: why did you go into the army? i want to get an education and job security. we went in there to serve the country. they don't do that. >> stephanie: can we go back to the dope analogy? who was the dope dealer? >> caller: hello. >> stephanie: all right. i'm guessing they drummed him out -- >> they drummed you right out. you come crawling back to broadway. broadway doesn't go for booze

and dope! >> now you get out of my way because i have a man waiting for me! >> i guess broadway wasn't one of the neighborhoods that had the dope. >> stephanie: the dope. >> the dope came into the neighborhoods. >> stephanie: i haven't heard that expression in quite some time. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] >> stephanie: my new friend from the charlotte airport delivered a warning to the republican party in a letter to supporters urging him to come around when it came to the immigration reform as part of the process. a party that appears to ignore people won't get a chance to make a case for the principles, any of them. they won't be ignored apparently politically, the hispanics. that's a problem for them. >> i'm not going to be ignored. >> stephanie: gingrich slammed mitt romney for his immigration policy saying statements like his much maligned call for self-deportation contributed to the losing support among communities of color. >> communities of euphemism. >> stephanie: well looky here. senator mark begich a democrat in a republican-leaning alaska is sure to be targeted by

republicans in 2014. it is a must pickup if they hope to control the congress's up err chamber. it is showing surprising strength in popularity. he has a 49% job approval rating. 39% disapproval and a big big lead 54% to 38% over former governor sarah palin. [ wah wah ] >> she quits. >> stephanie: to be very unpopular on the homefront. 34% of voters positively to 59% with a negative opinion. [ wah wah ] only one politician is less popular. joe miller, the tea party guy. begich would wipe the floor with miller. apparently sarah palin did call the vatican and say how is that popey changey thing working out for you? [ ♪ circus ♪ ] it is a joke. rocky mountain mike wrote. >> i do not understand what you mean. i'm german.

[ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] >> stephanie: as we know, fox news gave her the ole heave-ho along with dick morris. >> gave her the heisman. >> stephanie: right. dick morris removal from fox news. on account of gross electoral wrongness. morris unveiling the -- he's reinventing himself as a republican moderate. [ ♪ magic wand ♪ ] he said i'm trying to explore ways in which the republican party can win national elections without sacrificing its basic principles. >> i'm guessing not with you. >> stephanie: wow. yeah, that's his latest -- magical transformation. >> i predict republicans will win next year in a landslide. >> stephanie: because of him saving the republican party with his new ideas. >> yeah, like running conde rice as president. >> buy my book. conde versus hillary. he's the wrongiest wronger in

the history of wrong. >> stephanie: jacki joins us. we've got celebrity stack. we've got stuff. stay tuned. "the stephanie miller show."

surprise -- your house was built on an ancient burial ground. [ ghosts moaning ] surprise -- your car needs a new transmission. [ coyote howls ] how about no more surprises? now you can get all the online trading tools you need without any surprise fees. ♪ ♪ it's not rocket science. it's just common sense. from td ameritrade.

>> announcer: stephanie miller. >> if i ever take up roller derby, what do you think my name should be in bruisin' b.

anthony, alicia sleaze? >> how about harl et owe scare ra. >> that's genius! >> stephanie: this is "the stephanie miller show." welcome to it. 1-800-steph-12. >> stephanie: good morning jacki schechner. >> good morning. >> stephanie: okay, you know like we always bring you weird things from the interwebs. >> of course. >> stephanie: chris found a new one. text from a dog. >> in all caps it says knock bin over, drag some stuff. angry cow. >> red bull? >> probably. brain feels all electricky. lie down. been burying stuff. >> what stuff? >> microwave and stuff. [ laughter ] [ applause ] >> i want a text from max and fred now. >> stephanie: this is really -- the right wing fringe of the interwebs conspiracy stuff is really -- jacki, i was reading some of this.

somebody sent me. it really -- the stuff that's out there about the gun nut that's like -- >> could you be less specific? >> stephanie: we were talking about the stuff saying that sandy hook is a hoax. >> thank you. >> stephanie: it is incredible. i assume you listen to every word i say. >> yes absolutely. every morning. >> did you say something? >> stephanie: they write inspite of this, many people believe the tv version of the sandy hoax drama. that's what they're calling it. it is a hoax. >> tell that to the parents of the kids who are dead. >> it is crazy to believe that sandy hook is a hoax. this is an irrational, emotional response. >> i don't understand. how do you turn -- okay, go ahead. >> emotional response to having your kids shot in the face. >> how do you turn a tragedy into a conspiracy? >> stephanie: it is a gun grabber conspiracy. >> we shot dead 26 people including 20 children because we want to pass new gun laws? >> it makes sense.

>> stephanie: the beginning of it is overwhelming evidence has surfaced to prove sandy hook is a hoax. helicopter footage supposed to show children escaping from the school obviously set somewhere else. blah, blah blah. >> they say it is overwhelming. >> stephanie: high-capacity magazines are important for fighting mignons and deterring a foreign enemy invasion. >> how disturbing and -- that's so disturbing on a thousand levels. >> stephanie: the ignorance of a public makes tyranny possible. many people believe the sandy hook, this amazing feat of ignorance can only be explained by a mental disorder. this type of mass psychosis has fueled the public support of murderers, dictators like hitler. once you get to hitler, i'm out. [ applause ] >> i think when we expand our mental health records, we should include the people who believe that was a hoax. should be the first person on the list. >> stephanie: exactly.

so by the way somebody was -- oh, eric boehlert, we were talking about -- the nra, their only solution is more good guys with guns, i guess. more policemen in the schools. we were talking about this thing going on out here. the cop on the loose out here. >> the story is incredible. they haven't made any progress yet really. as far as we can tell. the guy is still on the run. >> stephanie: we were saying that apparently they're thinking about a drone now. which may -- going to totally harsh some snow borders. >> it is a drone with cameras. >> in the latest news, i heard that they found some weaponry in the burned out truck and the truck had a broken axle which is likely why he burned it. >> i think there was a sighting of him at a lowe's in north ridge? >> it was a false sighting. yes, they did kind of put the store on lockdown and nobody was allowed to leave and they did that. >> stephanie: have you heard the only in hollywood angle for

this? charlie sheen to alleged los angeles cop killer, call me. >> you know what? cnn did that, too. i'm not sure who it was because i was listening to the radio in the car. someone on cnn said by the way christopher dorner, you should come to cnn and talk to us. that's the way to get your story out. >> what? >> i'm going to have to find the clip. >> stephanie: cnn is desperate these days. >> we'll have to leave it there. >> i'm trying to remember who it was. they made an offer for dorner to come with the story. >> stephanie: charlie sheen released an online video urging urging -- apparently he was named in the guy's manifesto. christopher dorner's manifesto. in a rambling online statement in which he threatened asymmetrical warfare he described sheen as fing awesome.

brief video posted at tmz charlie sheen, you mentioned me in your manifesto. i'm urging you to call me. let's figure out how together to end this thing. >> it is not fair to call -- i'm not standing up for dorner but the manifesto was not rambling. it was actually -- it was actually very well-written and coherent. it is not the ramblings -- it is not the rambling of a mad man and there's no logic to it. >> it made sense. >> thank you. it made sense in that it was a coherent story. it doesn't make sense in that he's a crazy person and he's killing people. yeah. but obviously, you know, you can't say it was sort of this weird rambling diatribe. that's not what it was. >> stephanie: well, to be fair, true to charlie sheen his interventions with lindsay lohan is doing very well. here's other things that seem like a bad idea.

joe arpaio's posse had a special guest. steven segal as they tackled training scenarios in the event of a school shooting. they conducted their training at an elementary school to simulate conditions of the attack. you have joe arpaio and steven segal. >> steven segal has posse training how? >> stephanie: he's on a reality show called lawmen. >> they're training kids to respond? >> they're training posse members to respond to -- >> hanging out at elementary schools? >> stephanie: some of joe arpaio's criminal posse members. that seems like a good idea. >> i'm out of words at this point. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] >> stephanie: in other celebrity news gawker brings us the news today. nelson mandela is a fan of toddlers and tiaras. did you see that? >> i did not see the headline.

i'm sort of a closet fan too. >> stephanie: are you really? >> i don't dvr it. >> my insomnia brought honey boo-boo. >> joe mchale says mrs. boo-boo looks like a thumb. all head and neck. it is the same width. [ laughter ] >> stephanie: here's the only silver lining in this story. there is a new reality show. nelson mandela does not appear in it. thank god. >> "saturday night live," they did a parody of all of the reality shows on bravo. it was like everybody has a show. >> yes. >> stephanie miller's neighbors mailman has a show. >> stephanie: all right. one last one gawker brings us mariah carey is so weird rich and drunk she celebrates christmas in february. i love the crazy mariah. she's my favorite. she posted almost three minutes of herself listening to herself specifically, her rendition

this would be like me drunk listening to my podcast. seriously, when i hit there it is time to put me out of my misery. >> stephanie: she listened to oh, come all ye faithful and celebrating christmas in february. she shows off a christmas tree recently purchased in connecticut and roaring fire and decorations. she wishes everyone a merry christmas. >> why does she have a christmas tree in february? >> you buy that in december. there are no christmas tree lots in february. >> oh, that's valentine's sign i saw in l.a. a sign on the 99 cent store that says your valentine's headquarters. >> oh. >> stephanie: cheapskate. here, honey, i got you a sponge. [ laughter ] >> a gift from the dollar store you better look for a new valentine. >> have some off-brand comet. [ laughter ]

>> stephanie: here's a spatula. i love you. are we having a loser party, all of us? not you jim. you're married. >> thursday night. i don't go out on thursday night. >> stephanie: at least we have an excuse for being losers. >> i will be asleep at 7:00. >> stephanie: like babies and milk men. love you, jacki schechner. >> love you guys, too. >> stephanie: happy valentine's day. all right. ed in new york, you're on "the stephanie miller show." hi ed. >> caller: hey, stephanie. long-time viewer and first-time caller. >> stephanie: yes. >> caller: love your show. you people crack me up. >> stephanie: thank you. >> caller: just regarding the post office crisis the alleged crisis, it seems to me that somebody's going to great lengths to soften up the post office and make it look like it can't be profitable like no matter how much postage you pay they'll never be able to get it right. what do you think might be the motive? do you think maybe somebody wants to turn this over to the

private sector? >> stephanie: ed, we were talking about that earlier. there's always some anti-union thing in republican stuff. >> and post office is famous for hiring a lot of african-americans, too. so there could be that component as well. >> stephanie: diane in lansing, michigan, you're on "the stephanie miller show." hi diane. >> caller: hi, stephanie. i'm so glad i stumbled upon your show. i have an issue with the gentleman who called about the gun buyback program. he said that taxes pay for that. well, in my state they have people donate to that. they don't pay taxes for that. >> stephanie: okay. interesting. >> caller: i don't know what -- >> some jurisdictions it is taxpayer funded. some, it's not. >> caller: okay. i just wanted to make that clear. >> stephanie: thank you for that. appreciate it. >> here in los angeles, if you sell back your gun you get a $100 gift card to ralph's. >> stephanie: and a 99 cent store spatula. >> off-brand comet.

>> stephanie: jerry in sacramento. >> caller: hello stephanie. i just wanted to sound a little paul revere warning here. i know we're giggly about how the republicans are killing themselves nationally but locally, they're winning the battle. we're fighting to keep our schools open here in sacramento. they're closing 15 -- i'm sorry. they're closing 11 elementary schools, displacing 4,000 kids at a perfectly good school, they're profitable. no reason to close these except the superintendent of schools hired as his chief of staff, the head of the local charter school industry and our mayor is married to michelle reed who is the goddess of privatization of schools. and so this is all local stuff. i think people need to make sure that we're not too distracted by all of the bright, shiny stuff out of washington and forget we're losing our neighborhoods. like i said, there's no reason why these kids are being kicked out of their schools. they're decimating neighborhoods.

>> stephanie: privatize everything. that's the answer. you know what? let's worry about the roads. make your own private roads wherever you want to go. it is up to you. >> toll road. >> stephanie: okay. >> as soon as you get off your driveway, you pay a toll. imagine paying a toll every five feet? good lord. >> stephanie: 46 minutes after the hour. right back with the remaining moments of "the stephanie miller show." >> announcer: there's something funny going on in talk radio. it's "the stephanie miller show." (vo) from the underworld, to the world of privilege. >> everyone in michael jackson's life was out to use him. (vo) no one brings you more documentaries that are real, gripping, current.

[ male announcer ] start with a groundbreaking car. good. then invent an entirely new way to buy one. no. no. no. yes! a website that works like a wedding registry. but for a car. first, you customize it. then let people sponsor the car's parts as gifts. dad sponsors the engine for your birthday. grandma sponsors the rims for graduation. the car gets funded. then you pick up your new dodge dart at the dealership. and all that's left to do is say thanks. easy. ♪ ♪ what we need are people prepared for the careers of our new economy. by 2025 we could have 20 million jobs without enough college graduates to fill them. that's why at devry university we're teaming up with companies like cisco to help make sure everyone's ready with the know how we need for a new tomorrow.

[ male announcer ] make sure america's ready. make sure you're ready. at devry.edu. ♪ ♪

he was a fashion icon living a beautiful life until a chance encounter took it all away. of all the hours in all his days, these are the ones you'll never forget.

♪ i do my little turn on the cat walk. >> that's how i sprained my knee. >> is it a hurry cane? they advertise it on late night tv. >> stephanie: it is also a chamois. it is a walking stick and a chamois. 1-800-steph-12 the phone number. victor in minneapolis you're on "the stephanie miller show." hi victor. >> caller: hi, stephanie. i wanted to call and tell you what i think about the gun buyback program. i think that most people who would take advantage of it would be the ones who can't sell the gun legally. they would return -- they would

go in and get rid of the gun that way. >> stephanie: you know what? i'm an old time gun grabber victor i don't care how we get them. >> i'm not sure that's entirely -- >> stephanie: get them all. okay. all right. oh, jeff in salem. steph, i was listening to the podcast only $4.95 a month if you buy a year in advance. what a jim-dandy idea. i overheard you were in ikea and it took a long time to produce a stool. i suggest taking a daily laxative. because i paid more for the handyman to put the stool together that i bought at ikea. [ ♪ circus ♪ ] than i actually paid for the stool. >> you're not handy are you? >> stephanie: no, i'm not that kind of les. >> and you're not swedish. >> stephanie: jesse in iowa with another future wife or husband text in time for valentine's day. a helper. a woman described as an aspiring

pornography star and her father -- >> everybody needs a dream. >> were arrested after a complaint from the woman's former girlfriend led to the discovery that the father and daughter were having a sexual -- [ buzzer ] the woman who was 16 or 17 at the time said hartford introduced sayers as her husband/father. >> i just think i'm gonna burst. >> stephanie: isn't that supposed to set off alarm bells when someone is introduced as a spouse/parent. i thought i made some poor life choices but wow! this is my father and my lover. what? [ ♪ dramatic ♪ ] >> sister, daughter. >> stephanie: wow. that's creepy, creepy, creepy. all right. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] a quirky smoothie shop owner trying to send a political message by charging them extra and donating the in unto conservative causes like the heritage foundation. for every 16 ounce smoothie, he charges conservatives $4.95 and

liberals are asked to pay an additional dollar. >> that means they're going to go somewhere else. >> stephanie: good business model! >> all three of them -- i guess that's all that lives in utah. all three liberals have been happy to pay it. this must be a red county. liberals don't mind. >> see them open that up in los angeles county. see how far he gets. >> stephanie: yeah, bring that garbage our way. jamba juice will kick your ass. jim, i have developed a schwarzenegger stack. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] i have so many built up schwarzenegger stories. this is almost as disturbing as the last one. there is a report an old photo of an old arnold performing a sex act. >> yikes. >> stephanie: i don't know which thing of that nature. >> we don't know which nature. the thing this is. which type of thing. >> stephanie: no. what kind of things are of that nature.

that was another one of our dreams. we've been on the air since he was governor. every time he would say at a press conference, things of this nature. >> these kind of things, things of this nature. >> stephanie: we know a lot of reporters, somebody please ask what kind of things are things of this nature? >> things of that nature and all of this. >> stephanie: what things are of that nature? >> we've never known. >> the world may never know. >> stephanie: good news for you, jim. he likes it when people poke fun of his strong accent and his movie lines. as you recall, we could not get enough of the movie lines. remember that? that worked in after about a day. i will terminate the deficit. >> he didn't terminate the deficit. it took a democrat to do that. >> stephanie: he said it is no longer frightening. he likes it when people mock his accent. in the '70s, people were frightened of the german accent.

>> it is technically us a -- austrian. >> stephanie: right. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] he said that he's 65 now. he gets better with age. he's in a new movie. the last stand. >> i don't think it did very well. >> stephanie: no? he said i got older i got wiser. i experienced certain things as governor that helped me with my performance. you did do some acting. >> there was a performance. >> stephanie: i'm talking about the housekeeper. >> yeah, i know. he had to perform. he had to perform in order to -- >> stephanie: here's the part where he says something that makes sense. he's called for american leaders to think beyond gun laws. he says u.s. leaders need to address issues such as parenting, mental illness as well as laws on firearms when discussing ways to reduce gun violence. and things of that nature, i'm guessing. [ applause ] >> stephanie: and other sorts of things. all right. little bit more fun stack before we go.

>> yea. what? >> man rescued after head gets stuck in public trash can in scotland. >> i hate when that happens. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] >> bury your head. >> stephanie: our entire show is about dumb things on the internet. a man in scotland has become internet's sensation as he was photographed with his head lodged in a public trash can. it took 40 minutes to free the man. one bystander said he was screaming and shouts for help. most people stood around laughing and taking pictures. >> they're scottish. they do that there. they don't help. they laugh. [ applause ] >> stephanie: that is now -- the advent of the iphone, it has made us more insensitive. i'll help but i've got to get a picture of this. >> i think that guy broke his leg. ha ha, ha. it is bent backwards. >> stephanie: i gotta get it. i'll be there in a second. hang on. all right. that's it for us today. don't